Existential Stuff, Life, News, Williamsburg

Farewell DieHipster.com, We Hardly Knew Ye

January 8, 2013

DieHipster.com the Brooklyn based blog started as “A place for real New Yorkers to vent about the invasion of attention starved, useless adults that we know as hipsters” has thrown in the towel. In a January 5 posting its founder said goodbye. For the sane and beardless, it’s a missive worthy of framing:

DieHipster: These culdesacian culture vultures have basically destroyed art and music just about to the point of irreparable. The price of such simple things like rent, coffee and certain foods have doubled and tripled because of these zany cockrag hipster fucks who glorify everything as if they discovered it. These smug, parentally funded interloping idiots pay $11 for two poached eggs and a leaf of fucking kale – and not on Park Avenue but in working class Brooklyn neighborhoods!!! Pizza, pudding, tacos and cupcakes are now earth-shattering, tastier than ever items (according to hipster wannabe foodies who have infiltrated the media) because some sickly-looking, heavily-tattooed, garage rock band failure who arrives to work via pogo stick or unicycle makes it?

The site was an oasis for those looking for a community of like minded folks who felt that the only thing skinny jeans were good for was chafing. For those looking for a reason the site has ended, a morsel of truth may be found in this tweet from its webmaster:

Alas, some are happy to see the site go as evidenced by this Greenpointers.com post:

Finally, the putrid and venomous, toxic and true waste of a blog – Diehipster.com is throwing in the towel.
The best part is that he is the king of hipster irony, because he focused more on hipsters than anyone else cared – thus perpetuating the spread of the culture he despised.
The only thing I will miss is all the traffic he brings to the website when he makes fun of us here. Good riddance! Finally the loser, who spent so much of his life caring about people who don’t care about him – lost.
I wonder what he will do now? Grow a beard? Eat a $10 candy bar? Change his name to Brent? Join a kickball league? Brew his own sustainable local Kombucha? Make a terrarium? The hipster world is his for the taking!

The site’s final “hipster beating” was posted on New Year’s Day:

Today, I saw Keegan and Logan stumbling back to their $2800 a month loft in their 19th century barber and paperboy outfits after celebrating another year of funemployment and Brooklyn homogenization by drinking cruelty-free champagne in which the grapes were asked nicely to juice themselves rather than being stomped; and eating local, organic Bushwickian cheese laced with red beard hair and American Spirit cigarette ashes. So I gave them each an uppercut; ran their brochure-like bodies through a paper shredder and tossed the confetti around my still normal and actually diverse neighborhood. End of story.

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